Troubadork

by Ben Walker

supported by
/
  • Immediate download of 12-track album in your choice of 320k mp3, FLAC, or just about any other format you could possibly desire.

    I reckon you'll enjoy listening to this on headphones, walking around empty city streets on a weekday afternoon. Download it for free and give it a go! If you like it you can always come back and pay me for it, or just tell someone else they should buy it. ;)

     name your price

     

1.
2.
03:17
3.
4.
5.
03:27
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
03:45
12.

about

It's amazing how many songs I find lying around on random hard drives when I take the time to look. When I put out This Is Not An Album last year, I chose all my favourite songs and left others to languish in digital obscurity. Listening back, there are some absolute gems. I left them off because they were too funny, too silly, too melancholy or too unpolished. But that's what makes them interesting.

This collection of songs represents the Troubadork years (officially 2008-09). I've written some liner notes for each track, which you can read by clicking on the song title. If you're an easily distracted visual learner like me you might want to read while you're listening.

Press play, and leave them on in the background while you go and check your email, refresh Twitter or create some sort of monster Excel spreadsheet. If you like what you hear, you can download the whole lot (just click the download button). You can have them for free if you like, but if they make you smile and you want to help me make more you can give me actual money for the download. I won't be offended if you just want to offer a couple of quid. I'm always happy to get the email that says someone just bought some music.

credits

released 07 February 2010
Cover photo: 'Musical Chairs' by Garrett Coakley, taken at the first Oxford Literary Death Match (www.flickr.com/photos/garrettc/4079753011/)

tags

license

feeds

feeds for this album, this artist
Track Name: Box Junction Heart
Angry looks from the guy with tinted windows to my right
The traffic's going nowhere and it made me think of you
Delivery man is trying to edge his Transit up the kerb
You're parked on the yellow grid and there's no way of getting through

You used to take me driving round the village pubs
You'd wind the Volvo sunroof back and warm my heated seats
Crank the tape deck nice and loud until the dashboard buzzed
Singing along to Chigago IX on auto repeat

Darling I'm stuck since you left me
I thought you'd gone but you haven't gone far
Darling I'm stuck since you left me
The lights have changed but you're still blocking my box junction heart

Anxious school run mothers can’t believe they have to wait
And angry tinted windows man is seriously late
There's one girl in particular attempting a complicated merge
I've given her a smile and a little wave to try to let her in
But there really isn't room for such a manoeuvre to begin
We'll never get anywhere with me over here and you over there

Darling I'm stuck since you left me
I thought you'd gone but you haven't gone far
Darling I'm stuck since you left me
The lights have changed but you're still blocking my box junction heart
The lights have changed but you're still blocking my box junction heart
The lights have changed but you're still blocking my box junction heart
The lights have changed but you're still blocking my box junction heart
Track Name: Dressing Up
The other day I wandered down
To the trendy part of town
Bought myself a funky little hat
Had a cup of herbal tea
With a guy that looked just like me
And we had a pretty deep sort of chat

He said he couldn't hack it
So I bought another jacket
It was made of tweed with leather elbow patches
Its cool was in doubt
But I sorted it out
With a couple of very clever little badges

I love dressing up like the other boys

You know last time I saw you
When I said I wore green before you
Well I realised today that I was wrong
Who could forget the party that time
When you mixed red with a sneaky lime
And I said "hey that combo's pretty strong"

I want to hold you tight
And tell you you were always right
But it's just too hard and I don't want to be hurt
So I help you with your bunches
While we finish up our brunches
And imagine how I'd say it on a t-shirt

I love dressing up like the other boys

Later on the bus I'm wearing black
The city boys are laughing at my back
I know they're only jealous
Cos they dress like my dad
Yhey're always trying to tell us
That they think it's kinda sad that...

I love dressing up like the other boys
(Flicking through the racks in the charity shops for a tight little cardigan)
I love dressing up like the other boys
(Drainpipe jeans with tight ankles and baggy knees)
I love dressing up like the other boys
(You'll never understand)
I love dressing up like the other boys
(We're all unique together)
Track Name: Putting Your Hand In The Blender Again
You're putting your hand in the blender again
Forgetting your own advice
You're putting your hand in the blender again
There are some things you should never do twice

You know how it ended up last time you got it on with that guy
The weeks of listening to Carol King when all you could do was cry
You said if he turned up you'd give him a slap and put the creep in his place
But there you are in the corner quietly attached to his face

You're putting your hand in the blender again
Forgetting your own advice
You're putting your hand in the blender again
There are some things you should never do twice

I can't really see what you're up to as he sneaks his arm up your back
Maybe you're finding the prime position to launch a surprise attack
But the more I see the more I stop believing all your hype
There's no way you need to straddle a guy to tell him he's not your type

You're putting your hand in the blender again
Forgetting your own advice
You're putting your hand in the blender again
There are some things you should never do twice

The fact that you need to avoid the guy is hardly rocket science
But how can I help it if somehow you've managed to fall for a kitchen appliance?

You're putting your hand in the blender again
Forgetting your own advice
You're putting your hand in the blender again
There are some things you should never do twice
Track Name: Bubble Bath World
Everybody wants to live in a bubble bath world
Where nobody can get to them
Everybody wants to live in a bubble bath world
Where they can be their own best friend

Everybody wants to live in a sepia world
Moving time and standing still
Everybody wants to live in a sepia world
Everyone loves time to kill

Everybody wants to live in their favourite film
So they can hear that line again
Everybody wants to live in their favourite film
That ends the same though you watch it
Time and time and time again...

The good guy never dies in sinking sand
The hot girl never stays with the evil man
The hero never walks away alone
Creatures from another planet go back home
Superman always saves the world again
And Elaine always ends up on the bus with Ben

Everybody wants to live in a bubble bath world
Everybody wants to live in a bubble bath world
But nobody has thought about
The wrinkles on their fingers when they get out.
Track Name: Validate Me
I put a hundred candles all around your room
I've scattered scented petals on the floor
I put three or four roses by the side of your bed
I know it's not many but the shop didn't have any more
Now I'm crouching in the candlelight waiting for you
I've been here for quite a little while
Why are you making me wait? You're never this late
And I need someone to treat me like a child

Oh, validate me
Just let me know I'm alright
Oh, validate me again
I need that yes to get me through the night

I keep hearing footsteps but nobody's there
I'm pretty sure my feet have gone to sleep
I can't help wondering what I did wrong
Or if it's just that my jaw's too weak
Maybe you're out there getting it on with a flashy sort of guy
Maybe you've forgotten about me
Maybe you'll think it's funny when you get home tonight
To burnt out candles, withered flowers and crunchy potpourri

Oh, validate me
Just let me know I'm alright
Oh, validate me again
I need that yes to get me through the night

Why are you taking so long?
What did I do wrong?
Why are you taking so long?
What did I do wrong?
Why are you taking so long?
What did I do wrong?
I just want to know

Oh, validate me
Just let me know I'm alright
Oh, validate me again
I need that yes to get me through the night
(yeah)
I said I need that yes to get me through the night
(woah yeah)
I said I need that yes to get me through the night
Track Name: The New World Order Store
There's nothing on the shelves
But don't be scared to look
There are no posters on the walls
There's no instruction book
This is a different kind of shop
To the ones you knew before
Let me tell you how it works
In the New World Order Store

There's no distraction for the eye
And we sucked out all the noise
There's no team of sexy girls
There's no team of sexy boys
It hasn't even got a shape
No corners you can see
And did I mention no escape?
There's only you and me

Why don't you tell me what you want?
Why don't you tell me what you want it for?
Why don't you tell me who you are?
Why don't you tell me who you were before?
Why don't you wait another day
Just to see if you were sure?
Why don't you give it all away?
Just what exactly do you need it for?

You want a wide screen TV
So it can make your family laugh
You want a camera with a flash
To catch the moment in a photograph
You want to spend your Sundays
Riding in a giant balloon
While a team of artists
Paints your face on the side of the moon

Why don't you tell me what you want?
Why don't you tell me what you want it for?
Why don't you tell me who you are?
Why don't you tell me who you were before?
Why don't you wait another day
Just to see if you were sure?
Why don't you give it all away?
Just what exactly do you need it for?

Why don't you try a little smile
Where before you've only frowned?
Why don't you head on home
And take another look around?
Track Name: Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall
Chicken in a hutch
He don't do much
Just pecks and flaps and wanders about
His cousin chick
Was getting sick
But someone's let the chicken out

He raised alarms
About battery farms
The work of a hero never ends
He gave the birds
What they preferred
To stop them munching all their friends

I want to get out of town
I want to bring Tesco down
I want to make cabbage stew
I want to keep chickens too
I want to raise goats and lambs
I want to be a rural man
I want to be rock'n'roll
Like Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall

He grows PSB
In the shade of a tree
He's such a country stereotype
He overdosed
On a nine bird roast
He knows his woodcock from his snipe

I want to get out of town
I want to bring Tesco down
I want to make cabbage stew
I want to keep chickens too
I want to raise goats and lambs
I want to be a rural man
I want to be rock'n'roll
Like Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall

In welly boots
He hunts and shoots
He picks his herbs in the morning dew
He's got it right
He's living the life
That's why I want to be like Hugh

It's not just for his dashing silhouette against the sky
Hughie's got integrity and that's the reason why

I want to get out of town
I want to bring Tesco down
I want to make cabbage stew
I want to keep chickens too
I want to raise goats and lambs
I want to be a rural man
I want to be rock'n'roll
Like Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall

Ooh ooh ooh, I wanna be like Hugh ooh ooh
I wanna walk like Hugh, talk like Hugh too ooh ooh
You'll see it's true ooh ooh someone like me ee ee
Can learn to be like someone like Hugh (one more time)
Can learn to be like someone like Hugh
Track Name: Candy's On Fire
Candy smiles and straightens up a painting of a mouse
Satisfied, she canters back to the trendy metal stool
Seven hours and no one's even wandered in to browse
One more hour of watching, waiting
Dreams of all the guys she's dating
Candy plays it cool

All day she keeps it bottled up inside
At night she bursts into flame

Candy
Candy's on fire
Candy
Candy's on fire

Candy throws her jacket on the retro leather chair
Switches on the disco music seriously loud
Pours a gin and tonic while deciding what to wear
No more watching, no more waiting
Now it's time for celebrating
Candy's going out

Candy
Candy's on fire
Candy
Candy's on fire

Candy rounds the corner just in time to open up
Creepy man is waiting with a coffee and a grin
Offers her a pastry and a flimsy plastic cup
Every morning he's been waiting
Even though he's irritating
Candy lets him in

Locked inside the gallery
Candy crossed the line
Playing with too much creepy fire
Now Candy's burning out

Candy
Candy's on fire
Candy
Candy's on fire
Track Name: (I've got this funny feeling I'm a) Living Legend
I've got this funny feeling I'm a living legend
Nobody knows it but it's true
And you thought I was just like you

I have the same thing every Monday
Cheddar ploughmans and a bottle of pop
I love you, Monday sandwich girl
And I hope you never stop
Bringing me my lunch
Cos I've got a little hunch you like me too

That's why I have to tell you Sunday night
I saw you in the scariest dream
You had a jumper on that you'd never worn
And I swear that it was green
I though I'd lost my head
So I wrote it on a note by the side of my bed

I woke up on Monday morning
With a megasupernatural fear
When I saw you with that jumper on
It all became so clear
I can see through time
If you really want to know I can tell you I'm
A living legend

Never before have I let these powers be known
Not any more, I can't save the world alone
I think I'm a living legend
And I know just what it's like
To be so cool people think you're not
And when I try to make you see me there
Swinging on a swivel chair
You turn away
You don't know what to say to a living legend

I know to you this sounds like such an awful line
But I've been racking my brain
Tell me, sandwich lady
Will you be my Lois Lane?
What's it going to be?
I can really see a future for Lois and me

Was that a no I heard you mumble?
Oh. I thought that's what you said
I'll have my usual ploughmans then
Can I owe you a couple of quid?
I'll pay you back next week
Cheers. Thanks.

Never before have I let these powers be known
Not any more, I can't save the world alone
I know I'm a living legend
And I've got just what it takes
So never underestimate
Everything I can do - what would it take
For goodness' sake?
I see through time
Why can't you see that I'm a living legend?

I've got this funny feeling I'm a living legend
Track Name: The Answer To Everything
What did she think she was going to achieve when she launched that plate at your head?
And now that you think of it why did you ever believe a word she said?
If she's just as bad as the others why is it you set yourself up for the fall?
Maybe you're secretly craving disaster and that's to blame for it all

Hey! Give me a break
There must be an easier way

The answer to everything is right in front of your eyes
So pick it up and brush it off and don't look so surprised
The good looking man with the seven step plan to success is selling you lies
The answer to everything is right in front of your eyes

It can't be that easy cos something goes wrong with everything that you do
It isn't ironic it's absolute crap and it always happens to you
Why do you waste all your energy trying to figure out who you can blame?
Maybe your deepest and darkest desire is to sit around and complain

Hey! Give me a break
I'll tell you the easier way

The answer to everything is right in front of your eyes
So pick it up and brush it off and don't look so surprised
The good looking man with the seven step plan to success is selling you lies
The answer to everything is right in front of your eyes
Track Name: Half Hearted
Wasn't this the swing we found in nineteen eighty-nine
When you were five and I was six?
Do you remember the time when we both ran back to my house
With rope burns on our hands
And the world seemed so big?

It does feel great to be back here again with you
But I wasn't expecting this
I guess there's a satisfying circularity
That makes this seem inevitable
But I'm gonna have to admit

I'm half-hearted over you
You made me feel things that I never really wanted to
I know you're pretty cool but I haven't really thought this through
I'm half-hearted over you

Don't you think our friends might wonder why we're going back?
I'm not so sure myself
Will everyone say we've run out of alternatives
That we've settled for second best?
Can we not find anybody else?

I'm half-hearted over you
You made me feel things that I never really wanted to
I know you're pretty cool but I haven't really thought this through
I'm half-hearted over you

We've been friends for so long now that I
Find it hard to know where to draw the line
If we're the same
Can you tell me what's changed this time?

I'm half-hearted over you
You made me feel things that I never really wanted to
I know you're pretty cool but I haven't really thought this through
I'm half-hearted over you
Track Name: You're No One If You're Not On Twitter
You're no one if you're not on Twitter
And if you aren't there already you've missed it
If you haven't been bookmarked, retweeted and blogged
You might as well not have existed

In the old days it was all about achievements
Collecting all your trophies in a shrine
Then everybody came across the internet
And suddenly you had to be online

A home page was all you really needed
To seem like a success but not a geek
As long as you updated semi-annually
And checked your email once or twice a week

You're no one if you're not on Twitter
And if you aren't there already you've missed it
If you haven't been bookmarked, retweeted and blogged
You might as well not have existed

Technology was moving rather quickly
And the next thing you needed was a blog
With intimate and detailed press releases
And now and then a photo of your dog

More recently the students brought us Facebook
And everybody has a hundred friends
The parties in the photos look amazing
They're not so great but everyone pretends

You're no one if you're not on Twitter
And if you aren't there already you've missed it
If you haven't been bookmarked, retweeted and blogged
You might as well not have existed

Now you need to publish every movement
And every single thought to cross your mind
I'm told the Twitterverse is full of rubbish
But most of us are actually quite refined

We validate each other's insecurities
And brag about the gadgets that we've bought
We laugh out loud at every hint of jolliness
And try to self-promote without being caught

You're no one if you're not on Twitter
And if you aren't there already you've missed it
If you haven't been bookmarked, retweeted and blogged
You might as well not have existed